The Conundrum of Hair Dye
by rainforest
Summary: Frodo and Legolas go shopping for Hair Dye, and the Hobbit gets much more then he bargained for.. (moral: Don't mess with an elf!)


'Now the main cliché in hair dye is.. choosing a color that blends well with your natural tint. Ofcourse, you can also do the very painful option of coloring your roots, which, unfortunately is really hard with the colors available here..'  
  
'But I only want to slightly highlight…'  
  
'.. ofcourse, you can also lighten your color slightly, so it's unnoticable..'  
  
However annoying Legolas Greenleaf could be, for once, Frodo was mildly grateful for the elf's ramblings. He was the only one he trusted to help him with the impossible task of choosing hair dye. And since Pippin had finally convinced his cousin to add some spice to the very plain-ish attire of Hobbit-looks (according to him, he himself actually had darkened his hair. To add a manish charm.) Frodo had finally given in and called Legolas, chief hair-dyer, to help him with the task of choosing a color.  
  
'So tell me again, why you're the 'best for the job' in choosing a very womanly-type .. thing?' he inquired innocently, cutting the elf mid-ramble.  
  
Legolas threaded his way through a group of giggling elf-maidens, all with their attention on him. He made a hasty bee-line for 'Bree Chemists', dragging Frodo along behind him. 'Like I said, all elves dye their hair.'  
  
Frodo couldn't get past this. He just grinned and held back a laugh. 'Even Galadriel?'  
  
'Number 103. Light Golden Blonde.'  
  
'Arwen?'  
  
'402. Cherry Coal.'  
  
'And you?'  
  
The elf rolled his eyes and stepped inside the Chemist store. 'It's a secret.'  
  
Honestly, if the Hobbit woudn't stop asking that soon, he'd flaming dump him in the middle of the Bree Shopping Mall and go home.  
  
Frodo wisely shut his mouth. Elves were so bad at hiding their emotions, he was sure he could tell from a mile off Legolas was more then annoyed.  
  
'Ah, here we are.'  
  
They stopped in the middle of the hair-dye section and looked around themselves. Rows of happy, contented Hobbits, Elves and Humans, all running hands through their newly-dyed, glossy hair looked back at them. Each picture was accampyed with a extremely cheesy dye-name.  
  
Legolas rubbed his hands together, with the air of one who felt much more at home in the hair-care section then at Mirkwood. 'So, what are you after?'  
  
Glad to get a word in, and ignoring the curious stare of who he was sure was a neighbouring Hobbit from Hobbiton (one who'd definitely spread the word that such a mannerly Hobbit like Mr. Frodo Baggins of Bag-End seemed it needy to dye his hair to attract attention.), Frodo carefully stepped forward. 'Nothing too drastic. Just, well, a slight more, you know, shine..'  
  
Legolas seemed immune to that idea. 'I thought you wanted to acctually look GOOD.'  
  
'Hey!'  
  
'Shine won't get you anywhere.'  
  
'I don't need the dumb-blonde look to get attention,' Frodo scoffed.  
  
Legolas opened and closed his mouth a few times, but couldn't seem to think of a response.  
  
After a few minutes, Frodo finally came back triumphantly from the corners of the Brown/Black section, holding a small box in his hands.  
  
"Light Brown Sunlight," Legolas read. 'What?'  
  
'I said I only wanted a slight change!' came the reply, along with a feirce Hobbit glare. 'You know, this stuff will add shine and a slightly more light tint.'  
  
Legolas crossed his arms infront of his chest and sighed dramatically. 'Fine!' with the tone of a child being sent to their room. However, suddenly, an idea began to form in his mind..  
  
'You go ahead, Frodo, I need to look at something, and here, give me the dye. I'll pay for it and catch up to you..'  
  
'Huh?'  
  
'Go look at that cloak shop over there.'  
  
This was replyed to with blank silence.  
  
Legolas bent down and whispered quitely: 'Personal bussiness, if you know what I mean..'  
  
'Oh!' Realization dawned and Frodo's bright blue eyes widened, but he scampered away to the shop across from the chemist.  
  
Grinning, the elf turned back to the dye, opening a 'Light Golden Blonde' box. This ought to be good..  
  
  
  
A few days later, after Legolas had gone home and Frodo had a chance to finally get rid of the numerous cousins and friends that seemed to always be over at Bag-End (Pippin, it seemed, only came for the food, since he had a strange talent to show up at Dinner and Supper time.) He insisted, that he needed some personal time that afternoon, and finally opened the box of dye. Inside, was a plain white bottle and all the other needed equipment for a succesful colorment. It took Frodo some time to work it all out. In the end, he reasoned, since the color could only turn out a light brown, he decided to leave it in for 15 minutes.  
  
  
  
Sam, who was trimming the roses in the front garden, stood up and surveiled his work. The hedge looked perfect, and he was finally done with the weeds in the side-bed of daffodiles. Infact, he was ready to go home. Striding to the door to say goodbye to Frodo, he was stopped mid-stride at a peircing scream from inside the house. Sam blinked, then bolted inside, yelling at the top of his lungs Frodo's name.  
  
A moment later, at an equal speed to match Sam's, Frodo bolted out of the bathroom, gasping and looking thoroughly terrified. When Sam saw his master, his first reaction was to gasp, and then burst out laughing.  
  
'This,' the older Hobbit said quite seriously, pointing to his mop of now a near White-Blonde hair . 'Is no laughing matter. Legolas Greenleaf is going to pay for this, mark my words..'  
  
  
  
Wrote this really quickly, hasn't been checked thoroughly either. But the idea just woudn't stop nagging me, LOL!  
  
Review.. pwease? Pwease? **puppy dog eyes** I'll beg! 


End file.
